Episode
8: The Milk Churns of Mars
By Edward Teach
The warriors of the Memorial
are in the exercise yard trying to get fitter. It has been noted
that they need to get fitter to repel any further invaders after
a succession of hit and run defeats at the hands of a raiding party
of killer Halibuts from the planet Grimm. Even a collection of black
and white birds from the planet Cheat gave the warriors a hiding
the other week!
Suddenly K9 discovers Doctor Whoof? behind
the TARDIS sniffing radiatioactive fumes out of a milk churn.
The Doctor is exposed as a radiation junkie!
K9 begins to realise that this explains his wild ranting, disillusioned paranoia
that everyone and everything is against him and his hallucinations that the Master
has turned into a giant fanny.
K9 starts wheeling round and round in circles
as his circuits overload with fear and helpless confusion. Even he would be hard
pushed to find a cure for the Doctor's habitual uranium fume sniffing.
To make matters worse the demented madman
Kassam has unearthed some Oxiran warriors whilst working on the foundations of
his planet, built entirely on his ego in his own image. They are now preparing
for an all out attack on the Memorial.
Can K9 stop Doctor Whoof? from sniffing radioactive
fumes and get him to pull himself together? Or is it all a plan of the Master
to get him hooked and render him useless forcing him to regenerate into someone
more useful?
The Doctor was last seen firing various Memorial
warriors into outer space with a fairground cannon, ably assisted by a trollop
from the planet Hangeron...
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